| I understand now that things are going to keep going on whether you like it or not. You can either choose to let it affect you, or move on and continue to be the person that you are.
I'm usually a pretty good, fun-loving guy, but more times than one, I let reality get to me and I get into stupid mood swings. While others just try to hide the fact that everything's changing and there's nothing anyone can do about it, I try to see everything for how it really is.
The only thing that I can't get over is this girl. She's the only part of reality that gets to me, every time.
Marijuana's been an interesting topic(to say the least) of our time, and everyone's had their own different views on whether to accept it, because it's going to be a part of our society forever, or to reject it.
Truth is: It's mainly one of the many drugs that makes me happy anymore. As Tom Petty would say, "Last dance with Mary Jane, one more time to kill the pain." Problem is, there's no "last dance" for me. It's taken over my life and has made me become the person that I am today. I never realized how much you have to smoke to become considered a part of the "stoner clique," until it was too late...
I've always and only wanted the best for the people that I love, and I guess that is my downfall. It's been an easy trip getting lost into this crazy whirlwind of drugs, drug deals, and bad friendship. I'm usually a pretty trusting guy, and people have chosen, like it or not, to time and time again abuse this trust with simple little actions that they overlook. I tend to observe things more closely than people think. I've let myself get drawn into a neverending cycle of pain and chemically induced "good times" that I thought I would never be the main priorities of my life. I say main priorities because our pain is our lives, and as for me, I'm always looking for a way out I.E. drugs.
I don't even know myself anymore. But I guess it's my journey through all of this to try to find that guy they call Linh. I just hope that I hurry it up a little bit, so I don't go insane.
Love, lust, music, sex, money, drugs, give me hell or high water, I'm still fucking alive.
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